


Everything Changes

by TheonSugden



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Light Spanking, M/M, Tumblr Prompts, bottom robert, discussion of barebacking, prompts, scars mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-05
Updated: 2015-02-05
Packaged: 2018-03-10 15:07:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,950
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3294905
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheonSugden/pseuds/TheonSugden
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Per tumblr prompt - Aaron tells Robert he loves him. Robert realizes who he truly belongs with.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Everything Changes

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt - "Can you write a fanfic where Aaron tells Robert he can't carry on the affair after he's married then Robert breaks down and spills his feelings and tells him he's going to break off the wedding then they get it on 

"Right…gettin’ pretty sick of this."

Robert was leaning over from the driver’s side of his beloved Audi, Aaron leaning in the passenger’s side like a prossie giving a list of prices.

"I thought this was what you wanted, Aaron? Haven’t I kept a respectful distance? Maybe you have a flat in France I could rent?"

Aaron knew that smugness was barely hiding Robert’s hurt over how they’d ended. That’s what made it worse, made it unbearable, because the ‘what if’ (what if Robert loved him as much as he loved Robert, what if Robert was just waiting for the right word or touch to drop his immaculately polished guard…) kept Aaron awake at night, kept him constantly off-balance during the day, especially days like this, where he saw Robert everywhere from pub to cafe to garage.

Robert was always there…but never really there. And Aaron knew that wasn’t just a coincidence.

Even as he wore a stone face, he wanted to touch Robert so much that he felt like his body was going to break into pieces every time Robert was nearby. Robert always made sure he was just close enough, tight ass ‘accidentally’ brushing Aaron’s crotch, blue-jeaned bulge pressing against Aaron’s backside in the mix of a pub crowd, soft fingertips dancing at the edges of his dirty hands over pork rinds and pints at the counter.

It was just another game, another way to keep Aaron off-balance.

Aaron didn’t plan to say what he said to knock the reins from Robert’s well-practiced hands. He hadn’t planned to say anything at all. It was just that smirk, the one that never made its way to Robert’s eyes, and how much Aaron needed to kiss him and touch him and wake up every morning next to him, but also needed to take him and shake him and remind him he wasn’t always in control…

"I love you, Robert."

The smirk was gone. Robert looked like a kid…a scared, confused kid.

Aaron wasn’t happy at all. He was a little relieved at finally stopping the words from clanging around in his head, but he was scared. Scared for more reasons than he could count.

"Robert, I…"

"Stop it," Robert pushed through his teeth, as if another word would shatter him.

Before Aaron could respond, Robert threw a piece of paper at him, scrawled while Aaron was still in his daze of confession.

It had the name of a town, and a hotel name and number.

"Be there in an hour and a half. If you’re not…"

He rolled the window up before he could finish the thought.

Aaron was sure he saw tears in Robert’s eyes as he drove away.

Aaron had to make up a few excuses to get off work, but he’d gotten good at that. Good at lies and deceptions. Some days he was sure he was better than Robert. That scared him. He didn’t want to lose himself. He just didn’t want to lose Robert either.

As he drove to the small hotel, he knew he probably already had lost him, that this was Robert’s way of giving him a nice kissoff. But he just couldn’t keep quiet anymore. Seeing Robert hurt him - hurt him bad. Hurt more than anything he’d felt since Jackson. He knew he couldn’t handle these lies much longer, how unfinished they were. If today finished it, at least he’d be able to crawl away as best he could, rebuild himself like he rebuilt cars. A piece there, a part here. Not what it used to be, but enough to get by.

His hand shook as he prepared to knock on the door.

This was it.

The last time.

The door opened, and Robert pulled him in, kiss rougher, more desperate than before…more desperate than they’d been in a long time.

"Oh God do I need you," Robert gulped, like he was choking for air.

Aaron pushed him away, taking every ounce of will power he had to do it.

"I didn’t tell ya how I felt for a cop-off, Robert," he said, staring at his feet. "Don’t wanna hear about how you got Chrissie good this time, or how you’re gonna keep me sweet. I can’t keep on like this."

Robert’s lips were so bruised and purple, and Aaron wanted nothing more than to sink his teeth into them. Robert was wearing his red belt, the one that reminded Aaron of a superhero. Aaron wanted to tear it off with his teeth, one loop at a time. Robert was wearing the grey jumper that was just a little too snug. Aaron wanted to lick his pecs through the soft cotton, bite and pinch his large lush nipples until Robert begged him for mercy.

He tried to focus on these thoughts, instead of on Robert dissecting him with his eyes.

"That’s not why I asked you here, Aaron."

Robert stepped forward, and Aaron found himself backing against the door, like he was in some horror movie.

He stopped to take a breath.

"Aaron…I need to know if you meant what you said, or if you just want to set me up or make me call off the wedding."

Robert had never been this sincere with him. Or, for all the times they’d stripped off or stripped each other, this naked.

It would have been so easy for Aaron to hurt him, the way Robert had hurt him with so many jabs, thought out and thoughtless. He knew he could break Robert. Some cruel part of him wanted to, wanted to see what it felt like.

"Aaron?"

He couldn’t do it. He couldn’t lie to Robert…or himself.

"Yeah. I love ya."

He couldn’t face Robert this time, face his face scheming and twisting on how to respond. He turned his back, talking into the sleeve of his hoodie.

"Heard somebody say once…they said, ‘I love the bones of ya.’ Thought that was daft. Never understood it ‘til now. I love the bones of ya, Robert."

Aaron felt a hand, strong on the surface but fading underneath, on his shoulder.

"I just so happen to love my bones too. One in particular."

Aaron laughed into his hoodie, almost afraid to show Robert he’d dropped his guard.

"That’s my Robert," he said, softly, as if no one else could hear.

Robert whirled him around, yanked him forward until their noses touched, one hand on Aaron’s chin, the other wrapped around his bottom.

"I am your Robert. Yours and no one else’s."

"What about…"

Robert shook his head, the grin spreading back to his face, only one more innocent and sweet than the man he knew and loved so often wore. This was worn as a window, not a shield. Or, to Aaron, a mirror - a smile to match Aaron’s own.

"I was waiting for your answer. The right answer. As soon as we’re done, I’m leaving Chrissie. My job…they’ll have to drag me away from that car by the fingernails, but…"

_But…_

_”_ I think it’s better if we stay away from each other for…”

Aaron laughed in disbelief.

"A week? A month? A year?"

He would have gone for the door, seeing another load of bricks coming his way, if Robert hadn’t held him by the waist.

"For your own good. I won’t play away. You can put a tracking device on my cock, if it’s big enough to fit…"

Aaron didn’t know whether to laugh again or to stick his head out the bloody window and scream that he wasn’t afraid of anyone or anything.

"You don’t know what I’ve faced, mate. I’m not gonna sit in the shadows while you get it from all sides. And don’t make another dirty joke outta that."

Robert nuzzled their noses together as some sign of solidarity, which melted Aaron’s sharp edges more than he cared to admit.

"I’m sure you’re brave and bold and beautiful, but you don’t know Lawrence. You don’t know how he hurts people. I was there with him, laughing every time it wasn’t me. I deserve what I get, but not you, or your mum, no matter how much she hates me…"

Aaron knew it was his turn to be strong now, to not let Robert down. He’d wanted to see Robert this way, to unpeel the layers the way Robert had with him. He knew this wasn’t just an act or a stalling tactic, and that made him want to fight for Robert - and himself - even more.

He held Robert close, the two strong and weak men sitting on the edge of the bed. They remained silent as their mouths met, as Aaron slowly stripped him, then himself, sliding one hand down his chest and the other down Robert’s, comparing physical scars to psychological scars.

As Aaron lowered Robert’s jeans and boxers, shoes and socks ancient history, Robert motioned for the lube in his jeans pocket. When Aaron, tugging on his fat cock, made his way back to the bed, Robert was on all fours.

"Last time we’ll ever have sheets this nice…bed this nice…make it a moment to remember."

Aaron had to remember to close his mouth as he took in the beautiful naked body before him, with the most perfect bottom he’d ever seen, or touched, or tasted.

"Fuck me….please."

He’d fucked Robert before, but never when Robert begged for it this way. Not when it obviously meant so much more to him than just sex.

Hearing Robert say those words just about broke him…and took everything he had not to leave a moment to remember all over the fancy carpet.

Aaron hadn’t brought any condoms. He was about to look through Robert’s pockets when Robert grabbed his hand, kissing it.

"Are you clean? I mean, do you have any…"

Aaron nodded.

"Got tested last week. Vic made Adam. I went for support."

Robert smiled, matted hair falling in his eyes as he motioned Aaron closer to him, sliding his thumb against Aaron’s tight foreskin to get a groan from the eager man.

"I know you don’t have any reason to believe me, but so am I. I…haven’t been with anyone but you or…"

He stopped before he said her name. Some selfish part of Aaron wished he never had to hear her name again.

"Robert, I’m gonna be honest - there’s nothin’ I want more than to feel…feel fuckin’ everything, but I just wanna make sure. Both get tested again, alright?"

Robert nodded, and Aaron sat on the bed next to him, letting Robert straddle his waist, sliding both hands in his dark blonde hair, peppering short kisses on his jawline before sliding his tongue inside Robert’s mouth.

"Still want you to fuck me," Robert breathed into his ear, biting his neck - hard - before leaning over Aaron’s waist to get a condom out of his jeans.

Aaron smacked one sweet cheek, then another, grinning at the yelp for each slap.

"That won’t be a problem."

As Robert kneeled over him, looking at him with pure love and adoration as he began to work on him, Aaron caught his breath. Robert was truly the most gorgeous creature he’d ever laid eyes on. He always had been on the outside, but now he was inside and out.

As Robert laid on his side and Aaron slowly began making their bodies one, he scraped Robert’s soft shoulder with his beard, kissed the singe he’d made.

Robert just grinned back at him, sloppy and loved up.

Aaron knew whatever they would face once they left this room was worth it.

It had always been worth it.

It always would be.


End file.
